Meg & the City

@wheelerharlemteam

As the holidays approach, I find myself reflecting upon what matters most in my life: my family, my friends, my successes, my kiddies.

Each day, from some of the city’s worst schools and roughest projects, my players come to Harlem RBI to learn to play the game of softball. There’s my catcher, a natural leader and with sure-hands and a rocket arm, aiming to pass science as a trade off to get in the line-up. There’s my short stop, a stubborn kid with a big heart, haunted by a glaring temper that often turns school hallways and the streets of El Barrio into zones of danger, making it nearly impossible to sleep at night. There’ my first baseman, who entered my roster late as the result of a five month program suspension. In less than a year, I’ve seen her go from a kid plagued by anger, violence and insecurity to my team’s most solid leader with the uncanny ability to own a room with her actions, sway opinion with her words and melt hearts with her smile. There’s the new kid who I had to fight to add to my line up because she’s a year behind in school and needed an advocate. In just a few months, she’s redefined work ethic, never missing a workout, forcing me to get up early for extra practices and proving to me, every day, that where there’s a will there’s a way.

The names on my line-up card make the distant reality of our nation’s achievement gap all too real and all too personal. From my lead-off hitter through the bottom of the order, I see real life problems: violence, poverty and neglect that perpetuate failure in school and in life.

However, despite all that goes so very wrong on the streets of East Harlem, I’m seeing my kids thrive against these great odds. My kids have all the potential in the world. They just need a little help.

This holiday season, you can be someone’s hero. Give a gift to Harlem RBI and make all of this possible for at least another year.

Best of Tidings!

USY

I was 21 years old. The oldest of my best friends. And it started as a mission. A list. ULTIMATE. SENIOR. YEAR. I was determined to do all the things I hadn’t done yet as a college student or needed to do before I couldn’t use the “college kid” excuse. Get a tattoo, check. Spend a Thursday night two-stepping at the Weed, check (and overrated). Attend all of my pledge sisters’ 21st birthdays no matter what, check. Go to the bars every night of the week, check. Steal the standards box, check (not overrated). Win homecoming, check. Be an Outstanding Senior, check. Spend a week with my very best friends.. a week we would never forget, check. Etc, etc, etc.

It started as a mission. It has become a theory. A lifestyle.

USY.

USY is about doing and being your best in your last year. It’s about leaving a legacy. It’s about having no regrets. It’s about not letting what happens in May dominate what happens in November. It’s about not panicking. It’s about not making excuses. It’s about living without fear. It’s about loving without holding back. It’s about putting away the Mortarboard and defining your life with memories and not appointments.

It probably shouldn’t even be called USY anymore. Now, its really UCY. Ultimate College Years. It’s lived by sophomores, by juniors, by 5th years.

It’s the only way to live in college. If you’re a Kappa Delta, and haven’t heard a really great USY story. Call me, text me, KIK me, Gchat me, Facebook me, HeyTell me.. just hear one. Sit Ellie down with a beer.. hear one from her. Track down little Kaitlin Himes or wise Meredith Pate.. hear a story.

And then, once you’ve heard one. Go make your own.

This is your USY. Do what you love, every day. If you’re stressing about May, stop. If you don’t like something, change it.. while you still can. If you don’t have enough time, quit a club or your job or wake up earlier and go to bed later. If you’re still waiting on your candlelight, stop. The ring will be there one day. USY will not. Start dreaming. Stop analyzing. Be emotional. Use all those shoulders to cry on. Buy someone a beer. Someone younger. Someone who will learn and grow from you. Invest in the babies. Now. Open your mind, arms and heart to new things and people. Ask someone you respect for their advice. Go on a road trip. Make your best friends do something just because you want. Do something for your best friends that they cannot do for themselves. College is about the people you meet and the things you create with them. Go start creating. College is short. Struggle is eternal. If you’re not living the dream, you’re not living.

You graduate in six months. Stop talking about it. Stop thinking about it. Just USY. All day. Every day.

You’re welcome.

For man, autumn is a time of harvest, of gathering together

If you read this (and honestly, I’m not sure anyone does anymore), then you most likely follow me on Twitter. If you follow me on Twitter, you know that this past week has been about getting my life in order (and finding Kasey Hanlon!). Why? What’s going on with Meg in the City? Let’s recap:

1. Summer softball is over. My kids finished the season on a high note (we lost in the semi-finals of the playoff tournament but competed with a team that beat the ever living daylights out of us in regular season. I’ll take it.). I finished the season on empty. Let me take this chance to say I LOVE LOVE LOVE everything about Harlem RBI (from the sport to the neighborhood and the fellow coaches to my little monsters); however, it is nothing if not draining. I now have most of my evenings and weekends back. This means I can catch up on the tasks and people I’ve been neglecting all summer. Couldn’t be more excited! (Please note: I’ll be coaching Fall Ball starting in one week so this could all just be a mirage. Stay posted).
2. Prioritizing. I survived most of my first half year in NYC by being goal-oriented (thankful for Kasey in helping me plan my life. she’s a great planner. you should all use her!). I survived most of the past few months by being people-oriented. I’m aiming to spend my autumn (and the rest of my life) blending these orientations to become better at doing life. The formula in my head looks something like this (goal setting + action planning + relationship building + prayer) - (idleness + wastefulness) = success. In order to start this formula on the right foot, I needed to put some things into perspective and order. The deadline was last night at midnight. I’m about halfway there.
3. Seeking. I’ll be honest. I don’t know what I want to be when I grow up. Not concretely anyway. I do know that I want to be fully aligned with what God would have me to do for work in the place that He would have me to do it. I know the place, at least for a season, is NYC. I know that I’ve been given an incredible experience to jump-start my career with my current job. I’m not sure of anything else. I do know that in order to fully align with what God would have me to do, I need to seek Him first. I’ll be spending the autumn doing that. I’ve been challenged by an incredible friend to compile my belief statements. The five main points I’ll be seeking to define are: the Trinity, Man/Sin/Salvation, the Bible, the Church, work and purpose. As I seek to more concretely define who God is and what the implications are for me and life, I’ll share. And hopefully start to answer some concrete questions for my future.

I hope that each of you will hold me accountable to this. I pray that each of you will harvest something of your own this season.

Best Mistake I Ever Made

Just two months before college graduation, I decided to forego my acceptance to the Teach for America Corps in Memphis. In a tough job market, I was offered a rare career job in the world’s largest public relations agency.   Armed with the belief that I could both always choose to teach and affect the education system from the outside, I moved to New York to spend a few years in the communications industry learning from some of the brightest marketing minds in the world, develop professionally, meet new people and return to my little house on the prairie before the city could really change me.

That was the best mistake I ever made.

I often wonder what prompted my final decision. I still can’t really remember the tipping point. Regardless of why, I settled into my current work role. And I’ve been blessed so far with a challenging work environment that has grown me exponentially in my first year out of college. That alone has exceeded my professional expectations. However, I know that there’s more to life than repping consumer brands. But the Lord works in mysterious ways. Although some days I wonder if I chose the wrong path, I ultimately know that I did something right.

I never could have known that by turning down one of the most important jobs in our country, I would open the doors to the most important job I may ever do.